Ready for a toddler bed?

When your child was a baby he may have gone from moses basket or crib to cot, perhaps he had a little trouble getting used to it at first but chances are that within a few nights he probably settled down and has been sleeping there ever since. Sometime between the ages of one and thee most toddlers will start to outgrow thier cots and it it then the time to move them to a REAL bed. The thought of this drives fear through the heart of many parents (myself included) as well as confusion about whether it is the "right " time for the little prince to face this change - or more to the point whether it is the right time for you, his parents , to face this change!.

I speak here as someone who went ahead too early with the move for my oldest daughter - wait until they are really ready - believe me it is much easier then. When my daughter was around 19-20 months old i thought "hey shes nearly two she MUST be ready for a bed - after all they ARE called toddler beds, what could possibly go wrong??" So off i set with my little alan key undoing the sides of her toddler bed making it into the cutest miniture bed i have ever seen- complete with Balamory bedding set, when i was done i stood back, in walked my daughter and to my delight sat down on the bed, "great" i thought " she loves it - that was easy". Everything was fine until bedtime. I took her up to bed and settled her in then walked out of the room, there then followed at least at least four hours of going into her room and putting her back to bed or running after her down the hallway, she didnt understand that she had to stay in her bed to sleep and short of holding her down we just couldnt MAKE her understand. Her speech and understanding had not developed enough to allow us to explain to her properly and she didnt understand the concepts of reward charts or specail toys that sleep too or any of the other little devices they use on TV. This went on for probably a month , I refused to give up and she just didnt get what the problem was, when she turned 2 she suddenly started to get it and she has been a good sleeper ever since BUT if i had waited just a little longer i could have saved myself countless late nights and a number of back injuries from chasing her back into her room while heavily pregnant.

Now, just beacause my daughter was not ready at 20 months doesnt mean that yours wont be - many toddlers could go into a bed happily much earlier than that. There a a few things to look out for when deciding on timing. Firstly can your child climb out of the cot anyway? If he can then a cot is petty pointless anyway and could be dangerous if he is in the habit of just throwing himself over the side and onto the floor - its probably time to buy a bed. If he is very young then you might find that you have some of the problems i had but equally you might not - good luck!. The second thing to look out for is when your toddler is capable of understanding the concept of rewards - ok this isnt strictly needed for him to sleep in a bed - but it will make your life much easier and i would really recommend that if you can wait until you can say "stay in your bed and---* insert treat here*". Or at least imply a reward in a way he will understand even if it is not in so many words. Another key thing is if your toddler can see that other people (i.e you or older siblings) have different beds to him he may actually want or ask to be the same, toddlers hate being different!. Finally your toddler may simply be getting too big for his cot - hitting up against the sides or arms stuck through bars etc - a bed would be more comfortable then. Making the change If you have a cot bed you could take your child to help pick out some special new bedding - if you need a bed as well then perhaps take him to help chose that too. For older toddlers try talking about your bed or thier older siblings beds for a while beforehand or even reading books which feature beds, make sure he knows that "big boys" sleep in beds and that it is fun to be a big boy!. Some toddlers will need a little help to stop them falling out of bed - some toddler beds come with little rails or you can buy ones to attach to beds. If you would rather not have a rail or cant get one to fit put something soft next to the bed for the first few weeks until he is used to not having bars to roll against! 

When you actually put his bed up show it to him and make a fuss when he sits on the bed or lies down. The first night make sure that he has all of his favourite "cot" things, any blankets or cuddly toys etc, and if he still has a dummy or bottle now is not a good time to take those away give those to him too. Sit with him for a while, read a story or just chat and when he seems to be calming down say goodnight and leave. With a bit of luck he will go to sleep - chances are however he will get back up and start playing with the hundreds of toys he has littered around his room. If he does the first thing to try would be just letting him - let him walk around his room, keep an eye on him but dont force him to stay in bed. After a while of this he will eventually get tired and bored and fall asleep - maybe on the floor maybe on his bed - but if you transfer him to his bed the important thing is that he will wake up in his bed. The most important part of this is not going in and interacting with him either by playing or by trying to get him into bed and also making sure he stays in his room. The first night he might go tp sleep quite late but do the same things the next few nights and he will probably find getting up and making a fuss less appealing and sleep more appealing. This is how my daughter learned to sleep in her bed. When we were trying to force her to lie in bed she would scream and scream and of course the more we fussed about it the more she did it. When we stopped fussing about it she quickly learned the association between being tired, her bed, and sleeping, now she goes to bed happily lies down and goes to sleep. If after a few days your toddler is still up until midnight then obviously you will have to try something else. One method loved by many is "rapid return". As soon as your child gets up go in a put them back in bed - no smiles no shouting no talking at all just quickly and quietly back to bed. Eventually they will give up and go to sleep. Another tried and tested method is a reward or sticker chart. Every morning give your child a sticker if they have gone to bed nicely, after a few days or a week give them a treat if they have so many stickers. This is more suitable for toddlers who are older and can understand the concept of both time and rewards. This really is a prefferable method BUT many many toddlers move into a bed before a chart like this is useful and so one of the above methods might be needed. The most important thingsare dont make bedtime a battle zone, dont use bed as a punishment and above all dont give up!